Comments for Life With Geeta

Comment on Sad, mad, bad (and pregnant) by Nandita

Nandita — Wed, 07 Sep 2011 05:36:51 +0000

Hey Babe,
I’m one of those overweight, unfit people who had a gorgeous, glowing pregnancy. But today, three years down the line and hoping for the next one, all I can share is that this is the ride where somewhere along the line, some inhibitions, some dignity and some dreams/ideas will be lost for good. This is also the ride, where you will discover things you didn’t know about yourself. Where your mind and body will transform themselves in ways you can only dimly imagine. Most crucially, you will discover how hard it is to simply let go. First, letting go of your body, as you’ve already found out. Then of other things more mental and ideological. In the end, the mothers we become are the mothers our children need. Not the ones we want to be Control will be lost and little pieces of us will be walking around outside getting into all sorts of trouble. All you can do is be strong, keep thinking and doing the best you can. Sorry for the ramble, but wanted to hug you and tell you it gets better. Muah!

Comment on Sad, mad, bad (and pregnant) by Kamala

Kamala — Wed, 24 Aug 2011 01:16:37 +0000

Thanks for sharing and being so honest Geeta. As you know, I had a really rough time with the nausea too and being hungry but not being able to keep anything down…really not fun! By being so honest, you are already being a great role model for your baby and showing him/her that it is ok to talk about how you really feel and what you need.

Comment on R.I.P. Jack Layton by Conservation Culture

Conservation Culture — Tue, 23 Aug 2011 22:15:44 +0000

Almost 10 years ago, he came out to support the creation of a 22km bike path in Vancouver by riding it with us in the pouring rain. That’s commitment, no public to see it, just a few wet public transit activists and Jack.

Comment on Sad, mad, bad (and pregnant) by Elodie

Elodie — Tue, 23 Aug 2011 15:03:36 +0000

Comme demandé, je “copie/colle” le texte qui accompagne le partage de ton article sur ma page Facebook. Geeta , belle leçon d’humilité et d’indulgence… Secrètement, je crois aussi avoir le contrôle sur ce genre de chose. Merci à ces événements magiques (O! oui, tout de même, LA VIE!) qui nous étampent dans le mur pour tout remettre en perspective!

Comment on Sad, mad, bad (and pregnant) by Audrey

Audrey — Tue, 23 Aug 2011 14:15:22 +0000

I should add, just so you know you are not alone and that there is light at the end of this tunnel, that one of my friends had a very difficult pregnancies. She always said “when will I get my body back? I always feel like a foreign entity has taken control over it and it drives me nuts”. Both her boys (two different pregnancies) were delivered without problems and were healthy and beautiful babies. My friend got her body to herself again as soon as they were born and became a wonderful mother to them.

I think pregnancy and birth are difficult times to go through, but when they are over, you have this new little person to love and a whole different facet of your being to develop. A baby grows inside the mother and is born, and then the mother starts to grow and transforms. It doesn’t happen the second they put that little baby in your arms. It’s not automatic. You don’t become a goddess of motherhood as soon as the doctor cuts the cord. Mother instincts do exist, but I don’t believe they are necessarily automatically present at birth. You first need to learn to care for your baby, take care of yourself to get back on your feet and learn to make a balance between your new life and what you thought your life was going to be. Just trust that you will grow as a mother every second you spend with your baby and let it happen. You won’t be a perfect mother, but you will be a very good one. Don’t let anyone (or yourself) make you feel otherwise.

Chin up lady

Comment on Sad, mad, bad (and pregnant) by shelley miller

shelley miller — Tue, 23 Aug 2011 14:07:25 +0000

I completely appreciate the honest look at pregnancy. As you know (Geeta) I’m 32 weeks pregnant as I write this. In all honesty, I feel like it’s been a decent pregnancy. The first 16 weeks sucked, yes! I too, had to accept the new person that I was and the new body I was living in (sharing, actually, with another person who’s probably just as strong-willed and independent as me and his father are!). I didn’t recognize the person who was *lucky* if she got 3 hours of work done in a whole day because all those other hours were spent trying to get out of bed, going back to bed or thinking about going back to bed. I had to write myself notes for every little thing or I would nearly leave the house forgetting to put my pants on.

As this is my first pregnancy, I don’t want to pretend I have all the answers, but if I could offer one piece of advice to other expectant mothers out there, I would say, be gentle on yourself. Give yourself a huge break and be ready to alter your expectations (maybe don’t even have any!). I was the picture of good health. I had near 6-pack abs before pregnancy. I was as fit as a 35-year old woman could be! I was so sure that I’d be that story you hear about women who are still running at 8 months, or training 4 days a week until they go into labour. In actuality, there are a lot of days when just walking home with a bag of groceries feels like a workout! I was a personal trainer for 6 years, motivating others to be active. I never thought I was going to be the one who needed motivation to stay active. I’m also the “weirdo” who gained 15lbs in the first 3 months because at that time, I was SO hungry, I couldn’t stop eating! Who is this person? I ate things in those months that you couldn’t have paid me to eat prior to pregnancy.

Shelley has left the building.

I’m pretty sure she’ll be back in a few months, but maybe not quite the same as she was before. I’ve stopped thinking I know what will happen. For now, I’m enjoying the ride. I laugh at the weird things I sometimes eat. I adore my huge belly. My body is doing things that defy comprehension. I’ve always trusted my body and I still do. I may not understand what it’s doing, but if I show some compassion towards myself, I know that my body’s wisdom will carry me through. It’s gotten me this far! There’s a human being growing inside of me and I didn’t even have to tell my body to do anything!! It just KNOWS how to do that shit!! How can I not trust my body?

Rather than focus on my fat ass, I try to focus on my giant boobs that seem to get everyone’s attention! Hey, I’m getting asked out more now than before I was pregnant! Go figure…

Hang in there… soon it’ll all be a story you tell, looking back. Enjoy it all while it’s here. At least that’s what I’m trying to do

Comment on Sad, mad, bad (and pregnant) by Audrey

Audrey — Tue, 23 Aug 2011 13:47:36 +0000

Poor Geeta I feel for you. Although I did have some nausea, it was never as bad as yours. I did have the cold and nasal drip thing for over a month though and I’m happy to say it’s mostly over. Think positive. Soon, you will be into the second trimester and it should get better. I’m at 23 weeks now, and I rarely get disgusted with smells anymore (although picking up the dog’s poop is still risky) and my appetite is getting better. Think about what the next weeks will bring your: less nausea, better energy and feeling the flutters of your baby’s acrobatics for the first time (if it hasn’t already happened). Hang in there, it can’t be this bad for nine months.

Comment on The name game by Marie-Claude

Marie-Claude — Wed, 03 Aug 2011 14:19:34 +0000

Hi and congratulations! I personnaly grew in the English parts of Montreal (DDO, etc..) with a French name and it was hell: none of my friends could properly pronounce “Marie-Claude”. I ended up often beeing called “Marie-Cloud” or “Marie-Clown” by kids who weren’t even trying to make of me: that’.s what they understood…As an adult, anglos still struggle, rhyming my name with “odd” instead of “ode”. I therefore picked reallly bilingual names for my girls, Kayla and Elsa.

On the subject of surname, I would also personnaly go with yours in light of your husband’s position. the fact that it’s an hommage to your family is wonderful and yes, I too love the ring of it.

As for first name,Nila, India and Leo are wonderful. I share your love and fear for Geniève: it’s beautiful but…My spouse is named Matthieu ( did you catch the double “t”?) and his name is commonly misspelled. I think you can have originality that is easily spelled. I lreally like Charlotte ( can be nicknamed Charlie) and Henrick.

Best wishes to you for this wonderful experience.

P.S. 18 years into the game, the best thing I ever got as a mother was “Efficient parenting” by Thomas Gordon. It’s a wonderful method that avoids conflict when raising kids and truly fosters self-responsability in children instead of punishing to “make them do what you want”. My girls are really high achievers (national gold medaillist, 100% score Math Ministry exam, and mutiple other prizes and top of just beeing happy!) and the best part of that is that it’s not because I’m pushing them, it’s because they push themselves. I also love the type of relationship it created with them. I know you won’t need this until your child is about 2 but in the blink of and eye, he or she will be

Comment on Bedtime chez Bladkarni by rotem

rotem — Mon, 25 Jul 2011 22:22:22 +0000

love this, geeta! can´t wait till dahlia and matan are old enough to partake in this action. although we have been training dahlia to give massages. she gives nice 3-second ones. but she´s only 3. i have much to look forward to. we may be borrowing this nadkarni tradition.

Comment on The name game by geeta

geeta — Mon, 25 Jul 2011 11:34:45 +0000

Wow, guys. Thanks for your thoughtful and insightful comments. Looks like we might go with Nadkarni after all. As for the first name, I know I really want it to be a relatively uncommon name. Not unusual necessarily, just uncommon. I like the idea of a name with a little pizazz, a little drama, hence “India” or “Leo”. Pat and I both work in the media and it’s not entirely unlikely that our kid will want to try his or her hand at this world. I would love to pick a name that is memorable. When people hear it on the radio, they stop and listen.
I love Shelley’s suggestion that we create a list and Audrey’s that we wait for something on that list to pop. Elizabeth, I’m with you on the double barrelled thing. I figure we might use “Blain” as a middle name. That way it’s there for the record and the kid can use it if she/he wants. But they aren’t saddled with having to hyphenate. I also think your advise on pronouncability is very sound. And I’m shying away from “creative” spellings of names too.
Alison, Pat’s vetoed your “Blain Nadkarni”, although it did give us a good laugh! (First time offender?! LOL). Genieve IS quite elegant, but I wonder if folks wouldn’t just misspell or misread it as Genvieve?
Anyway, lots of excellent food for thought here. Thank you all for taking the time to write and share. The most exciting thing about this pregnancy really has been these conversations…